Your personal goals are easy. If you pursue a reasonable a goal well, you will achieve that goal. But marriage is a team sport, and if you and your spouse aren’t going after a goal together, progress will be slow at best and real success is unlikely.
All too often husband and wife pursue different valid goals. They may both be great, but going separate ways won’t get you where either of you want to be.
This is where specific goals and clear communication are vital. Just “wanting a better marriage” won’t do it. How exactly does a better marriage look? What stands between you and that goal? And how should you jointly pursue that goal?
In addition to your goals being specific, they must be narrow. Working at different part of a broad goal isn’t going to be particularly effective.
What makes this tricky is that you will have different marriage goals. Even if you both want the same things, you will have different priorities for various goals.
So how do you decide what goals to pursue first? Some goals are prerequisites for others. Not reaching some goals will harm your marriage far more than others. So flipping a coin isn’t a good plan.
~ This is Paul, reminding you that Doing Marriage Well means moving together.
We walked a Rhododendron garden while we were away.
I love Rhody’s. Many can’t handle our cold, but a few can. I need to do some research and get a couple.
Image Credit: © Paul H Byerly created with ideogram.ai & Paul Byerly
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