One great way to get from point A to point B is to hire a guide.
We can do this in marriage with a friend, an older couple from church, or with a coach or counsellor. As with books, you want to make sure what you get is good. In fact, this is even more important with input from other people. A good guide can take you to places you might never go on your own. And a bad guide can get you lost; or worse! A similar faith is critical when you seek help from others.
A good guide has been where you want to go. When Lori and I were having difficulty at the start of our marriage, the only couple willing to help us didn’t have a marriage we wanted to emulate. We decided that was not going to help us.
Knowing the way is not enough; a good guide also knows how to help others. Among other things, that requires being able to understand where you’re starting from, and your abilities. It may be faster to go over a hill than around it, but if you can’t manage the slope, it’s a bad option. A guide also needs to be able to tell when you need a break.
For marriage help, we’re big fans of working with another couple. This gives you both a male and a female viewpoint, and improves understanding. It also means you each have an advocate.
And yes, Lori and I do coaching for various marriage issues, including sexual difficulties. And the ministry we work with has others who can offer various help.
~ This is Paul, reminding you that Doing Marriage Well sometimes takes help.
The lilacs are blooming! We also have white, and last year we got a dark purple one we will put in the ground this year.
Widget is more interested in finding that robin that keeps leading her away from its nest.
Image Credit: © Paul H Byerly created with ideogram.ai & Paul Byerly
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