Podcast: https://bit.ly/3WO3HLX
Having differentiated marriage coaching from marriage therapy and marriage counselling, today I want to discuss what marriage couching looks like. The idea behind things like life or business coaching is that the client has the answers, and the coach help them find those answers. This means a skilled business coach need know nothing about a person’s industry to help them find ways to do better.
I see marriage coaching differently. I see it more along the lines of what a coach does for an athlete. The coach knows “the game” and knows ways to help each player reach their full potential.
Google’s explanation of marriage coaching is what I do:
Marriage coaching is a forward-looking process where a couple works with a coach to identify and achieve specific relationship goals, enhance communication, and build a stronger foundation. A marriage coach teaches couples tools to manage struggles, resolve conflicts, and better understand each other.
- Goal-oriented: The focus is specific goals. That could be better communication, more time together, dealing with financial stress, or improving sex. With a goal set, the couple works together to achieve it.
- Present and future focus: There may be some looking back to see why certain things happen, but primarily you deal with present issues and building skills to for a better marriage in the future.
- Skill-based: Coaching offers practical tools. You learn ways to communicate better, deal with conflict, or make time for things you want to do together.
- Partnership approach: The coach acts as a guide to help the couple improve their marriage. Coaching is tailored to whom each husband and wife are, and what they want.
- Action-oriented: Coaching is active, with specific steps to improve your relationship. Homework is common, and the coach may email or text you between sessions to nudge or encourage you.
If you think coaching could help you improve your marriage, Lori and I would be glad to work with you. It’s possible to start with one spouse, but for coaching to bring about significant changes, both of you will need to be onboard.
~ This is Paul, and when it comes to Doing Marriage Well, I know “the game”.
More fall colour.
Image Credit: © Paul H Byerly created with ideogram.ai & Paul Byerly
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