Podcast: https://bit.ly/4o4mCy9
One of the frustrations of anyone who works with married couples is that most folks wait way too long to get help. The problem gets bigger as frustration and anger grow. These emotions, along with the distance they can cause, bring on more problems. When the couple does get help, they may have dozens of issues, and may not even remember what started the cascade.
If you get help early, the process will be faster and easier. Sooner is better.
I suspect the delay in seeking help is often largely about shame. We live in a world of bad marriages, we’re possibly children of divorced parents, and for some reason we think we should know how to have a good marriage all on our own.
Beyond needing help to save your marriage, coaching is an excellent way to make any marriage better. It’s like deciding you want to improve your golf game; if you aren’t doing as well as you’d like, you need some help. It’s a joy to watch a couple with a good marriage find ways to be even happier.
Coaching works for couples of all ages. Lori and I have worked with newlyweds, retired couples and everything in between. Life changes such as the birth of a baby, all the kids being in school, having teenagers, and the empty nest are good times to examine and adjust. A couple of meetings with a coach can make doing that easier.
You may have seen me promote a once a year “check-up” with a coach. Aldrich ministries now offers a check-up, at a great price. This is a good way to see potential problems before they become a big deal. It can be used to help you set goals, and it gives you a way to track how your marriage is doing.
Yes, I’m pushing coaching. I think it’s a fantastic tool. I wish Lori, and I’d had such a thing forty years ago. We could have saved ourselves a lot of pain and struggle and got to a great marriage so much faster. I think that is why I am so big on others getting help.
~ This is Paul, and Doing Marriage Well is a skill you can improve.
Lori titled this picture “Will look derpy for belly scritches”.
Image Credit: © Paul H Byerly created with ideogram.ai & Loir Byerly
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