Podcast: https://bit.ly/4o588hs
So what does sex coaching look like?
Pretty much the same as marriage coaching. You express your concern or problem. The coach works to clarify the issue. Information or suggestions are offered. A goal may be established. Then the couple goes home to give it a try.
One of the challenges with sex is most folks don’t know nearly as much about human sexuality as they should. Most of us got less than adequate sex education growing up. Most of us got more miss-education from porn, popular media, and friends than we got factual information. Some folks don’t know enough about their own sexually, and far less about their spouse’s sexuality.
I recall one woman who was losing her mind because her husband got erections while he was sleep. She was afraid she was not satisfying him, and he was going to get a lover or leave her. She was laying awake at night, regularly checking him to see if he was erect. When we explained that men get erections during every dream they have, she felt so much better!
Lori and I have “solved” months of frustration for couples by suggesting a penis ring, a new position, or a vibrator. Other times all that’s needed is a bit of sexual biology or talking about how men and women differ sexually.
Some couples just need a safe place to talk about sex. A coach can help overcome embarrassment and provide a framework to discuss what each spouse feels and desires. Some couples resolve their issue with each other once a coach has helped them start talking. And, some couples are looking for help to determine if certain sex acts are acceptable to God.
All of that said, often when a couple comes to us for help with sex, it quickly becomes obvious they have marriage problems that are causing or complicating the sexual issue. Sometimes resolving the marriage issue makes the sex issue go away. Other times it makes dealing with the sex issue far easier. As a bonus, resolving sexual problems can bear fruit in the marriage beyond sex.
Yes, Lori and I do sex coaching. If it’s just a sex problem, it can probably be resolved with one or a few sessions. As with marriage in general, sex coaching can also help you move from good to great.
~ This is Paul, and coaching can help you do both Marriage and Sex Well!!
Had a nice halo around the sun when Widget and I went out the other morning.
The picture does not do it justice.
Image Credit: © Paul H Byerly created with ideogram.ai & Paul Byerly
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