Podcast: https://bit.ly/4rb27k0
Can’t do a Playlist week without the Beatles! So today, When I’m Sixty-Four.
Will you still need me, will you still feed me
When I’m sixty-four?
It’s a cute lyric—until you realise plenty of couples reach their sixties feeling more like roommates than spouses.
Will you still want me when we get older? There’s a more important question – are you doing things that keep your marriage alive so your marriage is still alive when you’re older? If you want a good marriage when you retire, you have to have a good marriage now. You have to stay connected. Keep talking. Keep doing life together. And make intimacy, of all kinds, a high priority.
Doing that is difficult as the kids get older. The late 30s and 40s are usually very busy years. When you have too much to do, it’s tempting to think your marriage is good and coast a bit. But marriage is like going up the down escalator – you have to work just to not lose ground. Coast for very long, and your marriage will suffer.
Common interests need to be cultivated before you retire. I’ve seen couples realise when their children all move away that the kids were the only thing they had in common. In theory you can work to find common interests at sixty, but I assure you that is very difficult, and some couples who tried it that way failed.
Doing the garden, digging the weeds
Who could ask for more?
What you do together need not be exciting or expensive. Sharing the simple things can be enjoyable and satisfying.
Every summer, we can rent a cottage
In the Isle of Wight, if it’s not too dear
We shall scrimp and save (We shall scrimp and save)
Of course some of what you want to enjoy together may cost a bit. Saving for a shared dream is always a good thing, be it a once-in-a-lifetime vacation or a yearly trip.
Mine for evermore
Forevermore starts now. Are you building a solid forevermore? What could you start doing together? Gardening, walking, cooking, church serving, day trips, board games, DIY, volunteering, learning a skill, or saving towards a dream?
~ This is Paul, reminding you that Doing Marriage Together is Doing Marriage Well.
Image Credit: © Paul H Byerly created with ideogram.ai & Paul Byerly
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