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Would proof that generosity is good for your marriage encourage you to be more generous? If so, this post is for you.
The Survey of Marital Generosity talked to 1,365 couples. They found that generosity was positively associated with marital satisfaction and negatively associated with marital conflict and a perceived likelihood of divorce. The study defined generosity as small acts of kindness, displays of respect and affection, and a willingness to forgive one’s spouse his or her faults and failings.
When Baby Makes Three, the 2011 State of Our Unions, a report from the National Marriage Project, went further. The authors of the study said, “Generosity is an important and sometimes overlooked dimension of marriage and family life.” Generosity was defined as “the virtue of giving good things freely and abundantly” and was seen played out in specific ways:
- Small acts of service
- The expression of affection
- Displays of respect
- A willingness to forgive mistakes and failings
This study listed generosity as the third most important predictor in its top five predictors of marital happiness. In marriages where generosity was below average, only 14% of husbands and wives said they were “very happy” in their marriage. In marriages where generosity was above average, 46% of husbands and 50% of wives said they were “very happy” in their marriage.
Yet another study found that “religiosity” is positively associated with marital generosity. So those who follow Jesus have a leg up on this. The same study determined that the most potent predictor of generosity was spouses personally dedicated to their partner and to continuing the relationship.
These reports suggest to me that a solid path to wedded bliss may be found by embracing an ethic of generosity that encompasses a spirit of service, frequent displays of affection, and a willingness to forgive the faults and failings of one’s spouse.
To get started, pick one of the study’s four pillars – an act of service, an expression of affection, a display of respect, or letting a minor mistake go, and do it before the sun goes down.
~ This is Paul, and the data shows generosity is at the heart of Doing Marriage Well.
A dump trailer of sand is hours of fun for the grandkids!
Eventually it goes in the bird barns for cleaner feet and fewer mice.
Image Credit: © Paul H Byerly created with Nano Banana 2
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