Podcast: https://bit.ly/4wpRahF
In the US of A, we just celebrated 250 years of freedom. So I thought this week I’d talk about the freedoms we should have in our marriage.
You will sometimes hear people talk about marriage as giving up your freedom. There is some truth in this. Living well with a spouse does put some constraints on us. If you’re going to be late, you call. If you want to take off on a whim, you discuss. And if you want to rock out at 3AM, you wear headphones.
But a marriage done well has freedoms for both spouses. These are granted to each other, but they are also actively nurtured by both. Often it’s a dance, as where you want freedom to be yourself may conflict with where your spouse wants the freedom to be themselves.
So what freedoms should exist in a healthy marriage?
The freedom to be wrong: We all make mistakes, from little ones that no one else notices to massive ones that disrupt multiple lives. We make honest mistakes based on bad information or misunderstanding, and we do things we know are wrong because of selfishness or past injury.
Giving your spouse the freedom to be wrong means you will give them the benefit of the doubt and offer forgiveness in generous amounts.
The freedom to be wrong makes it easier to see and to admit when you’re wrong. It makes you feel safe and helps you fight the urge to hide what you did. It also reduces the need to blame others or justify your actions.
Beyond that, the freedom to be wrong means we can risk and take chances. We don’t avoid things because they might not work out because we know our spouse won’t use a failure against us.
Of course we must avoid taking advantage of the freedom to be wrong. And we need to offer it in return.
~ This is Paul, and Doing Marriage Well is never error-free.
Never what you want to see when your home is surrounded by forest!
This fire is actually 100 miles away and is burning mostly wheat fields and brush.
Image Credit: © Paul H Byerly created with Nano Banana 2
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